A woman comes into the Fitting Room shoving clothes into our return section–where other coworkers come and take unwanted clothes back onto the sales floor.
The woman says, “I’ll be right back.”
“I can just put this into a room for you,” which is generally the best idea, especially considering I don’t even have customers.
“No!” She sighs at me as if I’m stupid, “I’m not trying it on right now! I’ll be right back! I’m just going to leave it here…”
I already know I’m in trouble, and I already know I’m dealing with either a rich, bigot idiot or, well is there any other kind who act like they own you? “I can’t leave it here, someone will take it back out.”
“I’m going to be right back!” She yells at me.
I tell her I’ll leave it at the register if she doesn’t want me to put it in a room, that way it won’t get lost.
“I’m not buying it! I didn’t even try it on!”
Okay, I’m definitely dealing with an idiot. “I understand you, I just don’t want it to get lost.”
“Whatever.” She angrily walks away. And even if she just had someone die, or someone sick, there are things called respect and dignity–but then why would she be trying on velour tracksuits?
Either way, she returned in about four minutes, giving me the eye, and walking promptly into a room–ironically it would have been the first room I put her in anyway. This is the irony of the idiotic, they make the world slower, they make evolution slower, and they waste other people’s times because they can’t think outside of their narrow, narrow little lives.
She finally decides she wants a top and is obviously furious we don’t have her size. A store, several miles away, just a fifteen minute drive, might have the item, but she refuses to go there. “Can you send it here? Can’t do you anything? I don’t want to drive all the way out there!” So I tell her, I can call them, and if they do have it, we can just send it to her home. Finally, she shuts up.
So I ask for the item, and she starts going off again, “How long is this going to take? Can you ring up the stuff I want to buy right now? I don’t want to wait. Is this going to take a long time? Can’t I just give you all my information and you order it for me?”
“We don’t even know if they have it yet, they’re still looking.”
“We, then ring up this stuff.”
At the same time, the person on the other line comes back and says they do have the item. I tell the rude woman they have her item, and they can take her information–as it will be faster, because she already knows all her information. Of course, I already know it won’t be, because this woman obsessed with time makes everything take twice as long.
So I’m ringing up her transaction, listening to her, “What? Why do you need this information? What, yes, that’s my billing information. Wait, wait, I have to check.” She’s sighing, questioning everything they ask. She’s asking them, “How long is this going to take? How long is this going to take?” She complains to them. My transaction is done, and what usually is a quick–name, address, phone number, is taking forever because of this woman. So I help the next customer, as there is a line now.
“What?” The woman sighs yelling into the phone, “This music is so irritating, it’s giving me a headache, I can’t think!”
I quickly go and turn the music super soft, and the managers nearby turn and look at me, asking what I’m doing.
I say into the walkie, “The customer thinks it’s too loud and irritating.”
The customer in front of me says, “What? This is great music.” Yes it is, it’s classic and Christmas music, because this is the season of cheer and giving. This fact is obviously lost on my rude customer.
Then I hear her say, “No, this is taking too long! I am just going there myself! Goodbye!” She bangs the phone on the counter, since the receiver is behind the counter, as if she were slamming it to hang up. She doesn’t say thank you, nor anything for my patience and understanding while she was being a terrible, horrible example of a human being, then storms out of the store, as angry as the first moment I met her.
The customer in front of me, laughs a little, saying, “It’s just this time of year, everyone’s stressed out.” I wanted to reply, “No, this is how people are all year long.” I should know, I write about it.
Right after this, I called back the other store, because I had to apologize for how rudely the woman was acting and how terribly she treated the person on the phone who was only trying to help her get what she was looking for. This is how horrible some people are, how real shopping customers can be.
Don’t listen to people saying, “Kill them with kindness,” because when they look at you like you’re a ‘product’ or a slave for their bidding, they could care less if you were the most helpful, kind and generous person in the entire world. They’ll still think you’re worthless.
Customer Type: Big Baby, The Capitalist, The Dumb, Modern-Slave Owner